Jenelle's bookshelf: read

The Story That Must Be Told: True Tales of Transformation, Vol. I Writers on the Edge Hungry Girl: Recipes and Survival Strategies for Guilt-Free Eating in the Real World Armageddon: The Cosmic Battle of the Ages The Remnant The Mark

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Friday, February 4, 2011

5 Reasons Friday: ": Why I am OVER IT !!"

1.         Snow Days:

Problem:  I have not been to work a full week since the beginning of January which means that I am behind in work and pretty much tired of trying to work from home and manage a 4 year at the same time.

Why I am over it: I can’t control the weather, and that I am not the only one that is the same situation at work. I will continue just be thankful that I have a job (and I am lucky to have VERY understanding boss). The work will get done when it gets done.

2.         My mother

Problem: My mother trying to tell me how and what I should do to raise my daughter
Means that I am constantly trying to defend my position of knowing what is best for my daughter.  Which causes argument with my mom and me coming out of it feeling like I did something wrong.

Why I am over it: Stop arguing. Just let her talk and intermittently agree.  I will admit that some of her advice is correct but at other times, I will do what I think is best (and of course not tell her).

There is no rule book on how to raise children and each child is different in various ways. Sometimes we have to parent to our children and figure out what they need and stop trying to make them into individuals we want them to be.

3.   My Boyfriends Ex-wife

Problem: causes a lot of arguments between us. Because he is going to defend her in certain situations because he doesn’t want to “rock the boat” or “call her out” immediately on situations even when she is with the B.S (but I can guarantee if she thinks he did something wrong, she is on him like “flies on shit).
Why I am over it: Work around the situation and refrain from saying “I told you so when things happen” and from getting completely irate about things. I can’t expect all divorces to turn out like mine in terms of getting to a point where we both know are flaws, somewhat accepting our mistakes but in the end knowing that we have to parent our daughter together.
My life together with my boyfriend is wonderful so why let someone else ruin what we have. If she wants to be miserable and childish and live in her bubble…so be it. 

4.   My 4 year old daughter

Problem: My 4 year old is always “perfect for everyone else” and this causes me to feel like I am not doing something right and question my parenting skills.
Why I am over it: I need to be tougher with her punishments and follow through with them. Just sometimes being a single parent you are tired by the time you get home and don’t want to argue all the time. It is easier to give in and not even fight the battle.
I know that I have to push through those moments sometimes, because I am doing her a disservice and it will only get worse when she hits those pre-teen and teenage years. I need to nip this in the butt right now.
Also just realize I am “mommy” and kids (especially girls) inherently push their mothers to the edge. I need to breathe easy and walk away when necessary for a “Mommy time out”
5.           Being a single mom

Problem: I have to be both parents. I have to sacrifice the things that I may want in order to provide for her. I have had many sleepless nights wondering how things will get paid or how I am going to make it through a week.
Why I am over it:  I can’t expect that tall dark and handsome or white knight in shining armor is coming to save me and rescue me from my troubles and save the day. I know why I made the decision to leave and the consequences that would come.
Things are what they are and I am strong in my faith and know that God will provide. Not maybe when I want him to but he will be right on time.
Also need to realize that people will not understand unless they have been there.  

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