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The Story That Must Be Told: True Tales of Transformation, Vol. I Writers on the Edge Hungry Girl: Recipes and Survival Strategies for Guilt-Free Eating in the Real World Armageddon: The Cosmic Battle of the Ages The Remnant The Mark

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Thursday, May 10, 2012

Divorce: The After-Effects

          A divorce usually ends up being a traumatic event. A bond which in a time was something very special is coming to an end. Contrary to what one might be inclined to think, a divorce not only affects the two people implicated in the now torn apart couple, but also the lives of the people that surround them, and especially those who were the product of their now gone love between each other: their children, that undoubtedly, can be the ones who suffer the most before, during and after the process if the proper measures are not taken care of.
           Once the divorce is over, the couple as well as their children have to learn to cope with new situations and new challenges, as the circumstances will be very different from the ones they were accustomed to when the couple was still together.
 A common feeling that may arise in the members of a family, both parents and children, after they have gone through a divorce is depression.

 In the case of the parents, they can start to feel alone and overwhelmed, as the person who used to be their constant company and help in the everyday events is now gone from their lives. They need to start relearning how to take decisions on their own again, without having their partner to consult to. Being able to be comfortable with oneself and getting accustomed to the new moments of solitude, which will contrast a lot to the kind they used to have before the divorce, is also something that has to be achieved with time. One of the best ways of distracting the mind from all the depressive thoughts that the members of the separated couple will start to feel is to be active socially, and fall back on their children, friends and relatives.

In the particular case of the children, if they were involved, the emotional impact a divorce can produce in them is potentially marked, especially if they are of a young age. The fact that they are seeing their parents argue and eventually grow apart is enough to produce confusion and sadness in them. They might even end up thinking that the cause of their parent’s separation is them, and that they are not loved anymore. That’s why it is of utmost importance to constantly remember them how much they are loved by both their mother and father, and that the reason of the separation has nothing to do with them. A children need to know that after the storm has passed, he will still have the same relationship with his parents as in before the divorce.

Regardless of all the measures that are taken, the fact that a divorce will be a traumatic event for the family can’t be escaped of. But it is possible to make the wounds heal faster when the process is taken with responsibility by the couple that has decided to part ways, so both are able to rebuild their lives as individuals once again.

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